See, relationships usually end, in the formal sense, when the people invested believe they're better suited outside of the relationship. Relationships exist as a medium for intense feelings, and when they come to an end - no matter how abruptly - it's only natural for some residual feelings to linger, even after the dust has settled, so to speak. While the fantasy may ease your restless mind for however long you allow it to, once you're hit with a reality check - it might take a while to get up. While it's perfectly natural to drift back to loved ones past in your mind from time to time, it's important to keep him or her there: in your past.ĭon't worry about what could've been or where you would've been now, had things gone a bit differently. Regardless of the circumstances that ultimately ended your relationship, it's important to come to terms with the fact that it is, in fact, ended. You don't know what the future could've brought.Īnother reason you might be caught up in the past, with respect to a relationship that didn't end properly, is you're still harboring hope for the future. We're naturally curious creatures.Īnd while curiosity is good, when it goes unattended to for too long, it's only a matter of time before it becomes an obsession. See, without concrete - honest - answers, our minds will wander. You're curious how the person you thought you knew could do what he or she did - you have questions.Ĭlosure isn't just some cliché tossed around relationships every time they go sour closure requires the answers to these questions. You're unsure of why things didn't work out the way you foresaw them. Part of the reason you're obsessing over your last unfinished relationship is you didn't receive the adequate amount of closure necessary to move on. When things go unfinished, it's especially hard to move on from them, probably because neither party knows where to start.Īnd here's why. These types of relationships tend to linger longer than others - and even become the topic of obsession for some well after the people involved decided to go their separate ways. Let's say your girlfriend had to up and move because of a new job opportunity - or you got too drunk at the bar and ended up making a horrible mistake (that you *actually* can't remember) - regardless of the specific cause, the relationship ended without a proper conclusion. I like to think of “unfinished” relationships as those that end because of circumstances that were not directly in your hands or weren't really premeditated, at any rate. That said, there is always that one relationship you can't shake and is almost impossible to take anything away from: The relationship that went “unfinished.” You'll take the aspects of those relationships you treasured and look for them in your next one, and as for those you didn't like, you'll now know what to avoid. Some you might've pumped the breaks on yourself others, you might've watched yourself get hurt in.Įither way, the end of relationships will likely be a theme during your younger years - and that's fine, really - it's the best way to figure out what you want from another person. Throughout your youth, you're bound to watch many relationships come to a screeching halt.
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